If I thought the first half of the week was crazy, the last few days have been insane! But God continues to show that this whole situation is in his hands.
I woke up Wednesday and was going to call the bank that holds our adoption loan. The previous night, I applied for a 2nd loan to cover attorney costs, but didn't know if it had been approved. I had been up for half and hour and was just sitting down with my computer to contact the bank. My phone rang and it was a loan officer. She informed me that instead of taking out a 2nd loan with a second payment and interest rate, we could modify our existing loan and just add the funds to that. Perfect! And it gets even better: Our monthly payment is only going to increase $1 a month. I had been so worried about being able to get funds quickly, but it was such a smooth start to my morning. And especially after meeting the birthparents the night before, it was such a gift that God continued to show me that even in my apprehension, he has this whole situation covered. It really allowed me to release my anxiety.
I spent the rest of the day contacting our homestudy provider to make sure our homestudy would be ready (and it is!!). I contacted the lawyer and everything is working out smoothly with her. And I contacted a lady from our new life church group whose husband is a firefighter. She arranged for me to stop by the firehouse to have him check the car seat. They don't do certifications here, but it just felt good to have someone, especially a 2 time dad, check it out. I also made a special trip to purchase a small August birthstone necklace for our birth mother. A spa gift card seems so cheap and fleeting compared to the lifelong gift she is giving me. I wanted something subtle, and something that wouldn't generate everyone asking about it....I don't want strangers constantly bringing up a painful moment in her, which could cause her to focus on that moment as something that defines her (it doesn't).
Mid afternoon, I decided I needed a break and headed over to a friend's house to hang out for a bit. This friend is a mom to 2 adorable boys, and her husband works with Gabe and is in Japan with him. She is lending me a moby wrap and showed me how to use it. While we were hanging out, Gabe's mom texted me that her flight out of LAX was turned back after an hour and had an emergency landing due to the radios quitting over the ocean. So her flight would be delayed 3 hours. Shortly after that, the birthmom called to let me know that the maternity ward was full, so the induction was pushed back a day (she has been great with keeping me in the loop). While this delay made my emotions yo-yo up and down again, it kinda was a God thing. Gabe's mom came in late and we got to bed super late. But it was nice to be able to sleep in and spend yesterday running Shaina errands (buying groceries, a chiropractor appt, mailing documents to the lawyer, etc). We also both got a nap in and spent the day enjoying each other's company and not so focused on the baby. And a day delay means that it will be Saturday in Japan, so Gabe should have the whole day off!
So today is birth day! The birth parents have been great with keeping me in the loop. And they seem excited when we talk....like they are excited for me. Jensen probably won't make his appearance until late tonight, but hopefully he will be here by midnight. I'm not quite sure what will happen at the hospital, and we'll just go with the flow. If Jensen is born super late, consent forms probably won't be signed until Saturday morning. That makes me a little anxious, but I'm giving it to God. If the birthparents are going to change their mind, I'd rather it happen now and not 4 months down the road. But I feel confident and am not going to spend this beautiful day worrying about the what-ifs in life.
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